So this is another layer
please. we need a prayer.
for one now lost to us.
I heard she jumped
off a building at the college.
I did not know her well.
She was the friend of a friend.
I do not believe that suicide is an unforgivable sin.
But pray for her none the less.
Pray that in that final act
is found what must have been felt to lack
that the father with his many rooms
offers more than just a place to stay
his name to pray
some ecstasy
for we have many rooms here on earth
and still
that feeling
which wakes up every day
and says
'perhaps tonight will be the night'
roams about freely and unfettered
and even when it screams out loud
to those around
not one person can really tell you
why to not just go and do it.
and now what happens?
do souls sleep until the end?
do they right away ascend?
do they walk among lost
as ghosts?
my own pain has seen that door a thousand times
but not yet opened it.
my own pain still exists.
and daily feels more discouraged and less hopeful.
We desire
we long
we pray
I do not believe
that heaven's hope
can satisfy
all that we suffer and lose in life.
Lord. Give us strength. Lord, give us what we need. Lord. Give us what we want.
