Not Trying

Somewhere out there
is a really wonderful lady.
The kind of gal I could really dig.
The kind of woman I can talk to.
The kind of woman who enjoys the things I do.
The kind of woman who can thrill me head to toe
if I put my arms around her and kiss her mouth,
the sort of girl who wont bring me down by being
all into something i don't like,
the kind of person whose personality is like music
to my inner ear,
someone beautiful.

She is probably married.
She is dating someone cool.
She would have liked me better when I had long hair
and wont recognize me in this suit.
She lives out of state.
She saw me somewhere, but when faced with crowds
I get nervous and shy and just walked on by.

how do i fool myself, this time, into being
and not trying.

Lonely and Horny and Shy.

"water, water everywhere, but not a drop to drink"

Perhaps something good will happen.

Venturing, as I rarely do, out and about
and on the town, I am stunned
with the vision
everywhere
of Beautiful, Beautiful women.

Art shows and restaurants
and just walking down the street,
Beautiful, beautiful women.

A path that stretches in all directions
away and out of site.

Sitting at home on a Saturday night,
as is more frequently the case,
chores need doing,
trying to cook for one,
the darkness of the night
closes in around me,
restlessly wondering,
where, out there, in this town of mine,
can a person go?

Every friend I have
is in some ways already occupied.
They are married. They are moving. They are doing something constructive.
Perhaps I should paint;
Isolated, lonely communion with color.

I am lonely and horny and shy.